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Mondays with Melitas – October 15, 2012

WINDING DOWN ON VODKA VS. ANTS                    OCTOBER 15, 2012

 

            I just didn’t know what to do about my words of wisdom for this week.  I had planned on continuing with a few more tips on how to wage war versus some of these household pests, but then I had 2 communiqués coming from family, so I had to think twice now.  This is hard for me to do presently because it is getting much harder for me to think just once.

            First, my niece (2nd actually) Roberta, couldn’t find the blogs on Tammy’s website, and she was worried, and that meant one great fan was out of the loop.  She was thinking that I had given up on my writing career, but we straightened her out so she could find the blog section, and she was all happy once again.  In fact, she replied to the blog that she had already tried the Vodka routine in her garbage dumpsters and it was working wonders — her ant invasion was off and out staggering around in a drunken stupor.

            Then along comes an email with attachment from my other great fan, my ex-niece-in-law, Maxine who lives over in Maine. It was all about what VODKA can do besides using it as a Martini, straight up with olive and a twist— the way my 94 year- old friend Annie enjoys hers. This made me sit up and take notice.  (I had to make it clear to myself about the “sit up and take notice” making it clear that it was not the same as sitting up and taking nourishment from the Warden.)  

            Maxine’s attachment could have been interpreted several different ways.  It could be that she was sick and tired hearing all about my ant invasions and the struggle I had eliminating them from my wash basin where I take care of all my beauty needs — and the needs are plenty these days.  Incidentally, I have some new wrinkle cream which makes the wrinkles look much better.  The wrinkles are still there, but I think they look better.  So maybe Maxine was politely telling me to get on with some other hair-raising stories of my life.  On the other hand, she may have been trying to pass on all these wonderful uses so I could keep writing about Vodka the rest of my days.  That way I wouldn’t need to dream up any new subjects. My brain would be in cruise control.

            I have to mention some of the things Vodka can do according to the article. Use it for stain removal, or to clean mold & mildew, preserve fresh flowers (This sounds like an anomaly to me when you can croak if you drink too much,) use as a weed killer, or an adhesive remover, clean chrome, chandeliers, eyeglasses, windows. You can even eliminate odors with Vodka — just mix one part vodka with 3 parts water in a small spray bottle, and go to it.  I am not giving you the recipes of the vodka for all those tasks, they do vary, so you will just have to go dig them up for yourself on the internet.  And if you do all the cleaning I do, you would not even bother.

            One thing I had over that long list is the fact that it doesn’t have my recipe for putting ants on the run, or on the stagger, as the case may be.  I am quite pleased about that, and I personally awarded myself the Gold Medal for Helping Your Fellow Humans with Life’s Little Hurdles.

            There are a few items I want to mention to make your life easier. Just think about Baking Soda. I would imagine you are already aware of it’s many uses, like leaving a box in the refrigerator, closet, or bathroom acting as a deodorant, but I will give you the procedure for Baking Soda as a DRAIN CLEANER.  One-half cup of B.S. down the clogged drain, followed by 1 cup of vinegar.  After 10 minutes, flush drain with a pot of boiling water.

            And are you bothered with FLIES?  Here is someone’s suggestion: take a jar, as in Mason or similar,  pour in one inch of liquid soap that has a floral, or fruity scent, then add one inch of water (I should be using “H2O” for the water since this is definitely a very scientific experiment) then place it on a counter top, or table where the flies are bugging you.

            Another thing with flies and how to escape them:  just go out in the garage and bring in the old box fan.  Bring up a chair and sit right in front of it.  It does wonders with your fly problem.

 MELITAS FORSTER              “MONDAYS WITH MELITAS”          OCTOBER 15, 2012

5 Comments to “Mondays with Melitas – October 15, 2012”

  1. Meli..That’s it…I am going to Costco and buying a huge cheap bottle of vodka. I’m certainly not going to use my ice cold Grey Goose. Your tips are better than tips from Heloise. Hope it works on crickets.

  2. Another winner, Melitas. You never disappoint!
    Jan

  3. Melitas- your stories continue to amuse and amaze me. I love them!!!!

  4. Dear Mena,

    Now aren’t you happy that I didn’t send an article about what to use Tequila for? Keep that for the sweet repasts.

    Love,
    Maxine

  5. Mondays with Melitas has me looking forward to an otherwise dreary day of Monday Blues. Your fan base is growing!

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"Because of Tammy I have found confidence in my writing and feel blessed to be honored in such a way. I have found my voice. I have found freedom! I recommend anyone for whatever reason to expand their life and sign up for her writing workshops or classes. You'll be amazed at how good you are and how everyone has a story worth telling. Sign up and set your voice free!"
Wendy Price, Palm Desert, CA

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Tammy L. Coia is an AWA Affiliate, certified to lead workshops in the AWA method as described in Writing Alone & With Others by Pat Schneider, Oxford University Press.


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