A NEW ENDEAVOR ….. June 11, 2012
…Or just a dredged up old, past one that didn’t even belong to me; however Gail Smith and I did all the drudgery to keep Gary’s Fluff and Fold afloat while he stayed afloat on a surfboard searching for the Big One — and no doubt still passing out his business cards. (See Mondays with Melitas, 6/04/12)
One day I said to Gail, “I think it’s about time for us to throw in the towel here —, and she countered back in the blink of an eye with “ Yeah, along with the sheets, wash rags, sweat shirts, and don’t forget the undies.” We were simply washed out in that laundry — and probably all dried up like an older prune (me) and younger one (Gail.)
We went back to our real world. Gail went back to being a sort of starving artist type, and I went back to being a sort of barkeep type. This was circa 1965. A few years later, Gail went back to the farm — and don’t forget the Cadillac Agency — near Kansas Cityto be with her aging father. They would get along beautifully if he was a kibitzer like she was. (I must look into that somewhere to see if that is an inherited trait.) It’s probably been 50 years since we lost track of one another, and who knows?, she may have become “late.” That’s how they say you have croaked in Botswana: you are late. Well, that is mighty true. From here on out, you are late for everything. (Read about “late” in The Ladies #1 Detective Agency” series by Alexander McCall Smith —you will be glad you did.)
With Gail out of the picture— and I don’t even know how far out — I have to dig up someone to help me open the New Age Fluff and Fold here in the Valley. It means the pool of prospects is very limited. Not that many want to take orders or follow my advice these days, and the Warden will testify that truer words have never been spoken.
If I can’t find all the ingredients to get a nice New Age Fluff and Fold up and running, I have a Plan B to fall back on, and just maybe it might be the better way to go in the first place. I would give classes on “How to Fold Your Laundry.” How many of you know how to professionally fold a FITTED sheet? Ah ha! got you there right off the bat! This would not take up all my time it takes up in running the business. I could schedule classes when I feel like it.
I will approach Tammy, my esteemed Memoir Writing Coach, and talk to her about my plans. I must try to be very diplomatic and tell her I need her office space once or twice a month on days writing workshop classes are not scheduled, and I will give her a pittance for use of the space, and she can get some of the glory being my assistant at these classes, simply because everyone taking my class will love and adore us for showing them how simple it is to have good-looking, folded laundry — instead of the way they are now just wadding up the fitted sheets because they haven’ t a clue how “they” do that.
There will be hundreds of ladies wanting to get into this class, and probably some guys may want to learn this folding method. The classes will be for maybe 6 or 8 at a time, and it will keep me busy juggling the schedule, etc. Each person will receive a sheet of Instructions and diagrams with all this wealth of information just in case they didn’t get the picture in class, and they will be able to pass it on to the next generation for their enlightenment. Just think about it!
THE END
(Some of my fingers keep locking up on me, so done for now)
MELITAS FORSTER MONDAYS WITH MELITAS – JUNE 11, 2011
How do you fold the fitted sheet!@#%$
I have been trying to learn how to fold a fitted sheet over 12 years now and I still haven’t quite gotten the hang of it so I better take those classes! When I think about it, I haven’t gotten the hang on many other things I need to learn before the library becomes “late”.
Hey M,
I think you should stay with being a Bar Keep!
As long as I’ve known you I have learned something new, folding a fitted sheet?
YOUR ONE OF A KIND!!!!!!! THANK GOD, TWO WOULD BE TRAGIC..
Sending you a Big Smack and a Great Big Bear Hug………….
Love you, Barbara
Hi to Alba.
ROBERTA, you will learn right here from your aged Great Aunt when you come with your mom, your sis, and Josh (nephew) at the end of this month for a little vacation. We will be busy, busy, busy. Fold, fold. fold to learn that trick; then there are the boxes of family photos to sort, then some family things that won’t go to the museum. Bring very casual work ensembles — shorts, especially.
NOW, ALBA. I KNOW you haven’t learned very many of the things I have tried to give you a clue to, so you’d better start paying attention. It’s all very important and it makes life easier.
Love to you both for putting up with me. Melitas, Mena, Meli, the Great Grand Marshal, etc.
Dear Mena,
Sign me up for your first class.
I wish I could be there with all of you to go through your wonderful photos. I know you’ll have a great time.
Love,
Maxine
Dear Great Grand Marshal, etc. I surely must have known you in an earlier life. I’ve told you before how so many of your experiences of which you’ve written have mirrored many of my own, albeit they happened about 20 years prior to mine. Oh well. You set the pattern. But I have to tell you I learned how to fold fitted sheets so long ago I can’t even remember who taught me, so I was thinking maybe it was you. Have we met some where in another place, another bar, another world. Keep folding, but don’t fold up, lest you become late. xoxox DD
Hi Mel, maybe I’ll send X man to take your classes, could use some help with the laundry, he’s wasting too much time on his garden, which
has not started to feed us yet:) Looks too complicated for me, I’m one of the “rollers”. You always make me laugh Mel, enjoy your visit with your family. Miss you guys, love Jenny
Welcome back Aunt Mena. Glad to see you’re up and about again. Enjoy your stories, so keep ’em comming.
Your Nephew, George